You Call That Art, Then?

Tea: Stomach Soother

Music: Blue Oyster Cult, "Godzilla"

Time: Night.

Keeping it short. Late, and I'm going to watch a cheesy monster movie with my son.

I was at the Review Studios Group Exhibition tonight, watching a couple of older guys (no wisecracks about me being an older guy, please) react to James Woodfill's Approximate Object, Quasi Effect.

(No, I'm not going to describe it to you in full detail. I'll just say that it spins, it squeaks, and it's made of wood, steel, motors and hardware, plaster gauze, acrylic media and gesso. You want more, either call me or go see it yourself.)

Anyway, it was clear that these two Did Not Approve. I didn't hear the entire conversation, but I heard all needed at the end: " ... and they call it 'art.'"

Ah, yes ... the mysterious "They." You know, the same ones who say things. Apparently, They are now in charge of determining what's art and what's not.

Granted, Woodfill's work isn't all that accessible to everyone at first look. When I reviewed his Relative Field (which is still up, by the way), it took me more than one visit to find a hook.

"I don't get it" is understandable. "I don't get it, but I'm going to give it another look" is commendable. "I don't get it, so it isn't art" is laughable.

That's what They say, anyway ...

Moderation in Moderation

Tea: Vanilla Lapsang

Music: Jayhawks, "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me"

Time: Night.

I'm trying to lose the phrase "It's the strangest thing," because -- well, really, how do you quantify that?

It's a strange thing, though: I'm becoming more efficient. I'm getting better at follow-through. I'm catching up on things I've been putting off for months.

Heaven help me, I may be growing up. Not that that's a bad thing, entirely. Has to happen sooner or later, I suppose.

It's not all bad, you know. Getting up early and staying up, for example, means I can get the routine things out of the way before they take over the day, thereby making me feel a little less guilty when it's time to slack.

What, you thought I was going all the way over to the Beige Side of the Force? No way. Sure, my inner child might have an earlier bedtime now -- but you can have my ratty Chuck Taylors, my cheesy monster movies and my rubber duck collection when you pry them out of my cold, dead fingers.

It's a balancing act, to be sure. Structure is good and necessary, but it can't take over my life. I need something of the random, the chaotic, the downright goofy -- or I'll die. Not physically, mind you, but the body is only a house for the self. And this self has to have the sparks, even if they must be a bit more controlled.

And now, time to hit the rack. Tomorrow, I get to organize the garage and make some calls on a shared story that's due next week -- and then I get to hang out with artists until well past dark-thirty.

I can live with that.

Tonight's scary story: Charles Collins, "The Compensation House"

Cinematic Cheddar

Tea: Chinese Melon Seed

Music: The Afterparty, "Girl with All the Cool Names"

Time: Night.

Weird not to be at a gallery opening tonight. There were a few going on, but the timing just didn't work out.

Oh, well. I'm thinking it's a good time to commandeer the DVD player and grab something reaaaaaaaaaaaally cheesy -- and no, I don't mean the presidential debates. (Cheese is sort of a recurring theme today. Unfortunately, there's no Piave Vecchio in the house, nor aged Gouda, nor even a big freakin' hunk of Halloumi for grilling.)

I'm thinking Japanese -- subtitled, not dubbed -- or maybe something with both cowboys and dinosaurs. Heck, why not go for both and then throw in a 62-minute pro-smoking spot featuring bloodsucking worms with arms and legs?

Tonight, it's all about quantity over quality. Pass the popcorn and the Jujubes, and cue the snarky commentary. It's showtime.

What's Japanese for "Ow" ...?

Tea: Christmas

Music: Tom Lehrer, "The Masochism Tango"

Time: Evening.

Sorry, y'all, this post is standing for yesterday's and today's. My ankle hurts like crazy, so I've been (a) keeping off of it and (b) keeping it elevated for the last couple of days. (Yes, I'm also doing the ice and compression parts of "RICE" -- those just aren't as much fun as sitting in a recliner watching cheesy monster movies.)

So far I've watched "The Son of Kong" and "Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack." "Gorgo" is next. After that, I should probably head back to Japan for something with Anguirus (or Angilas, if you will).

Why him?

Because he's a giant Ankylosaurus. Get it? Ankle-o-sore-us?

I kill myself sometimes ...

Mystery Living Room Theater 2008

Tea: Pu Erh Poe

Music: The Who, "Eminence Front"

Time: Night

It's time for Monsterfest. My son, my brother-in-law and I are going to watch "The Monster that Challenged the World" (actually, several monsters annoying a small part of the world).

We're going to crack wise, I'm sure. Because it's a baaaaaaaaaaaad movie. And sometimes, those are the most fun.

You don't want a movie that's sort of bad or kind of good. You want one that's either really good, i.e. "American Splendor," or really bad -- like much of my monster movie collection. Because when a movie's really bad, it takes on its own kind of campy hilarity -- one that absolutely begs for parenthetical snarky comments.

And so, I'm off to watch -- and comment. And with all this caffeine in my system, I might manage to get one or two good cracks off. So if you hear giggling ... that's us.

Tea: Yunnan Gold

Music: Bing Crosby, "White Christmas"

Time: Night.

There's snow on the ground, but only a dusting -- and that's on its way to being covered by a sheet of ice.

I have thought deeply today. Steeply, I'm not sure I can manage.

Now I'm thinking sleepily.

And since tomorrow's a weather day for the kids, I might not get out of my pajamas until three in the afternoon. There will be popcorn and cheesy monster movies. I'll probably eat cereal out of the box.

That is, of course, if the power stays on.

So ... 'night, everyone. Stay warm.

And I call dibs on the futon, for watching "The Giant Gila Monster."